Wore my shirt inside-out today. No one said a thing. Hmm... http://t.co/13tw2XuNpL
Jan 24, 2015
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Ciaoenrico
Give me liberty, or give me food. Or kill me.
I have a good excuse for not being able to remember anyone's name: People are very unimportant to me.
Jan 23, 2015
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"I learned a lot from my second marriage... I learned they won't sell you a handgun if you're crying..." - Lord Carrett #quotes
Jan 22, 2015
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I hate what's happened with #boots. What was something sexy is now a cheap disguise for ugly legs. #FashionPolice http://t.co/hp4TGQMMFK
Jan 21, 2015
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RT @businessinsider: Stunning photos show what happens to retired subway cars (and it's not what you expect) http://read.bi/1xyimGD http://t.co/0oJNGBk5gW
Jan 21, 2015
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Why do #marketers say dumb shit like "explode your business?" Explosions mean destruction. Aamco won't "explode your car" for this reason.
Jan 21, 2015
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Spent an entire lunch with co-workers, laughing and telling stories about that incompetent idiot that got fired. Good times, good times! :)
Jan 20, 2015
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Suggestion to @RockstarGames: Make the lead of the next #GrandTheftAuto a woman, and get @JulietteLewis to voice her, because she's awesome.
Jan 19, 2015
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9:30 on a Sunday and I'm not only awake, I'm at a store! Such adventure!
Jan 18, 2015
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#MyLastWordsIn5Words Put back my oxygen tube!
Jan 16, 2015
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It would be so nice if I could string up a hammock under my desk and sleep while a robot that looks just like me did my work today. #sleepy
Jan 15, 2015
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Do you think Nancy Grace is aware that sane people think she's an asshole? Or do they shield her from that?
Jan 14, 2015
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So simple, even children could do this. And children are even dumber than average. #Gym #Inspiration #photography http://t.co/YZ27HJK0eC
Jan 14, 2015
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#Cynicism isn't anything more than dispassionately seeing things exactly the way they are.
Jan 14, 2015
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"Canadian Railroad Trilogy" by Gordon Lightfoot (@Lightfoot365) is my new jam. Listen: http://t.thisismyjam.com/ciaoenr...
Jan 14, 2015
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My insane love of #Canada is also a great way of intimating, "America kinda sucks" without anyone noticing.
Jan 13, 2015
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Speed limits exist so cops can give out tickets. You don't have to obey it, you just can't get caught disobeying it. #Law vs #Morality
Jan 13, 2015
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ROFLMAO White People Shower More Than "Ethnics" Do http://cmplx.it/4cRuZ Naya Rivera on "The View"
Jan 13, 2015
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It's not that I'm terribly smart - I've just always been a really sneaky shit. And from the outside that LOOKS like smart.
Jan 13, 2015
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How to take a weak, tepid, 60s song and make it rock. One of my favorite covers of all time. http://t.thisismyjam.com/ciaoenr...
Jan 13, 2015
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RT @gspellchecker: And you lucky ladies even get your own entrance! http://t.co/MZF0ciyKn8
Jan 12, 2015
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Because dishes are round flat things we eat on, while plates... ? I stand corrected, but I'm unsure why. http://t.co/rfyD54fOal
Jan 12, 2015
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At the #dogpark, finding out how bisexual my dog is. "Will my dick feel good going in that? Then it's going in!" http://t.co/T8SxUJPbNS
Jan 10, 2015
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Realized I don't feel control over my own life. But since it's so boring it feels like it moves at 2 mph, I figure, "Who cares?"
Jan 9, 2015
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"Lazaretto" by Jack White is my new jam. Listen: http://t.thisismyjam.com/ciaoenr...
Jan 9, 2015
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I just can't seem to make myself go to the gym.
Jan 9, 2015
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Richmond clothing company claims Forever 21 ripped off their designs http://globalnews.ca/news... Cool! Another reason to hate Forever 21!
Jan 8, 2015
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