Where are the Death Panels? #debates
Oct 4, 2012
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Aryn Corley
Humor Columnist
RT @TheOnion: Panicking Romney Attempts To Lay Off Debate Moderator http://www.theonion.com/article...
Oct 4, 2012
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Big Bird will die in the next episode of "Birdwalk Empire". #debates
Oct 4, 2012
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Where the hell is @davidfeldman right now?
Oct 4, 2012
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Romney in favor of aborting taxes. #debates
Oct 4, 2012
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First, Sesame Street. Then what? Jersey Shore? #debates
Oct 4, 2012
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The #debates seem eerily like an episode of "A Prairie Home Companion."
Oct 4, 2012
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Oct 4, 2012
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I'm going to some advanced training in Havana, Florida in November. @navarrotells will you be speaking close to there?
Oct 3, 2012
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Every Tuesday, at about this time, there's a woman who darts off with her beau. She'll return with a fresh shower and a spring in her step.
Oct 2, 2012
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Watch this to improve your quality of life. RT “@AlexSkuby: http://t.co/M8Hq6efG”
Oct 2, 2012
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Hell yeah! Thank you @Whataburger #601. Always great food, great folks, and great service! Mgr. Joe Cozad
Oct 2, 2012
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RT @awintory: Last year, for 10th anniversary of 9/11, @BoulderSymphony premiered this work of mine 'Gray Rain,' a tribute of sorts https://t.co/zaItYTCu
Sep 11, 2012
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RT @mariashriver: May we all take a moment of silence today for those who lost their lives and the families they left behind... #Sept11
Sep 11, 2012
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I've got the craziest craving for fried chicken right now.
Sep 8, 2012
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Ah, time off! Sitting at #IHOP, waiting for my truck to get cleaned, is a pretty good thing.
Sep 5, 2012
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If #hummus had a Twitter account I think I would follow it.
Sep 5, 2012
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I'm thinking having Twitter AND Facebook going at the same time is much like being schizophrenic.
Sep 1, 2012
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We're going to see the Houston Texans play the Minnesota Vikings. The Juvenile Units LOVE riding in the limo! #Texans
Aug 30, 2012
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I started back to the gym a couple of weeks ago.
Aug 29, 2012
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I'm here at the KSAM studios having lunch with the lovely Brooke Addams. #Texas
Aug 28, 2012
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Thankfully, Facebook is there to help me stay abreast of what my friends are eating. #FB
Aug 26, 2012
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RT @mental_floss: If you need a different, harder to spell word for the armhole in your shirt, try armscye.
Aug 26, 2012
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RT @AlexSkuby: ... fun with myself and Leah Remini :) http://www.youtube.com/watch...
Aug 24, 2012
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Prince Harry's photos are no worse than that of his great, great, great, great, great, great, great grandpa Henry the Eigth.
Aug 24, 2012
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Please get this book! RT @navarrotells: What Every Body is Saying on Audio Books - Price has been reduced FYI http://www.amazon.com/What-Ev...
Aug 20, 2012
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The Juvenile Units love to ride in the bed of the pickup truck. They especially like it when I drive through the car wash. #parenting
Aug 16, 2012
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Happy birthday. I hope she gets lots of money and a nice dinner! RT @awintory: Today is my wonderful wife's birthday!
Aug 16, 2012
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I've started back to the gym. Let the soreness begin. #fitness
Aug 16, 2012
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I would like to extend my gratitude to all of you who've subscribed to my Twitter nonsense. I hope you have a really great day! #cheers
Aug 15, 2012
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Aug 14, 2012
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My sister in law is throwing a prom for her 40th birthday. I'm gonna go in a zoot suit.
Aug 13, 2012
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