Man Has Carefully Calculated Timeline For Revealing Negative Personality Traits To New Girlfriend | The Onion - America's Finest News Source - http://www.theonion.com/article...
"“I’ll probably reveal my occasional stubbornness and impatience to her right off the bat, just to get those out of the way,” said Hastings, noting that years of experience have taught him he will need to “play this just right” if he doesn’t want the relationship to end prematurely. “Then I’ll lay off for a full month and let that settle in before I start showing her how I can be pretty sullen and childish when I don’t get my way.” “If I were to let her see I’m a slob right at the beginning, that would probably be a little much to take,” he continued, “but after 12 weeks it should be totally fine to stop picking things up off the floor before she comes over.”" - Andrew C (✔)
"According to reports, the Clarksville, MD native has even slated an empty “catch-up week” just before the holidays so he can disclose any unappealing facets of his personality he has been unable to get to as scheduled during the calendar year." - Andrew C (✔)