"Lisa, The best way to make a change to be less about people's expectations and more about your personal values is to realise that you have a unique and valuable perspective. I see many of my friends (19-21 years) who just cannot comprehend that you can be who *you* want to be. Too many of them don't step outside their comfort zone, and as a result don't reach their potential. For many of them, it's because they don't want to put in the work to achieve their potential. They would rather just be ordered about, and then bitch and moan about why their life isn't how they pictured it. And to them the idea of being nice is the perfect way to get through life. But if they stopped for a moment and thought about the impact their actions were having, they would realise they were compromising big time. I think for me I have always had a strong streak of independence. I was always rebelling against teachers in school, voicing my opinion to friends about certain matters. So in a way, I have always..." - Josh Chandler